It makes me angry. You won’t like me when I’m angry.

Sometimes, I see something that genuinely angers me. Most of you reading this journal will know me fairly well, and will know that I don’t really do ‘being angry’. But, believe it or not, it does occasionally happen.  The most recent thing to agitate me is this website:

Now, I consider myself to be  a very tolerant person. I accept that different people have different religious beliefs and that sure, a Christian may well believe that I will go to hell for having pre-marital sex and not going to church on Sundays. What I find it very difficult to accept, and the main thing that has me so riled up is the sheer close-mindedness of some of these ‘fundies’ (religious fundamentalists). Not only close mindedness but also sheer stupidity. Take this for an example.

"Are… are you now disputing the existance of DNA???"

Yes. DNA can never be proven. Evolutionists are obsessed with it because they always say ”chimps share 97% DNA with modern man” etc. That’s great, however you would then need to prove DNA is real.

This, surely, is bordering on nihilistic philosophy – "’How do you prove the chair you’re sitting on is real?’ ‘What chair?’". I, as a semi-educated and vaguely intelligent individual cannot begin to fathom how a person can reject the existence of DNA, ignore all the evidence that they are wrong, and obstinately use it as a basis to argue against evolution as a fundamental process. 

Let’s take another example from the website.

Josef Stalin, Mao Tse-Dung, Adolph Hitler and Pol Pot are all tyrannical megalomaniacs who together killed more than 100 MILLION human beings in less than 50 years.
All have one thing in common besides breathing air:
They held EVOLUTION to be a fact

Anyone with even a modicum of common sense can see the huge logical fallacy here, or is it just me? How can this person even consider drawing a cause-effect relationship here? Two completely unrelated things cannot be said to be linked in this way!

I could go on, but I imagine that you will all come to very similar conclusions as I have. It scares me very much that people like this exist in our world. I don’t mind their beliefs, it’s the blinkers and stubbornness that worries me, their complete lack of respect for anyone else’s views and beliefs. I want to put a message here about how tolerance is so important, but I’m too angry to articulate a positive sentence so I’ll leave it at that.


Winning a battle, losing a war.

Depression is a very long term illness. It never occurred to me in November that in five months time I would still be in the same place as I started. I thought that a few weeks on the medication and I would be tip top again. I’d be back to being Alice, happy and cheerful and bouncy.
But still, some nights I can’t sleep, eat, think or move. I have so much pain inside, pain that I can do nothing about. It’s so hard to describe this kind of pain – if you don’t know how it feels then I can’t explain it to you. The only thing you can think of doing is turning the pain that is impossible to deal with into something you CAN deal with. In the case of most people, this involves self-harm. Physical pain is something you can deal with, something you can fix with painkillers or rest or whatever – the main thing is that you can do something about it in the short term.
Last night, I felt like I was going to suffocate from the weight of sadness, isolation and guilt weighing down on me. The pain was unbearable and all I wanted to do was cut my self; arms, legs, face, anything to distract my self from the pain.

But I didn’t.

I held up. I rode out the pain and came out of it OK. Shaken, crying, nauseous. But unscathed.

I am proud. One battle is a big step to winning the war.